Friday, July 3, 2015

My Addiction (or why I can't go fifteen minutes without checking Facebook)

Hi, I'm Mary and I'm a Facebook-aholic. That's how I imagine a meeting of us Facebook addicts would begin. Of course it would be done in a group message on FB Messenger. We would all need to be able to see our wall while we're discussing how Facebook is negatively affecting our lives. Of course, in a moment of complete honesty I'd have to admit to my addiction to Criminal Case, Words with Friends, Trivia Crack and Candy Crush Saga (many imitators...none to equal the allure of matching a striped and wrapped candy...oh the explosion!).

One of the most recent additions to Facebook includes "trending," items that apparently are so popular you must look, FB is telling you that these items are what all the popular kids are into right now. So today, for example, seems everyone is very interested in Caitlyn Jenner's every move, particularly her attendance at a Broadway performance in...wait for it...New York. They specify New York, as if there is another Broadway where they have "performances." Anyway, approximately a quarter of a million people attend Broadway shows during any given week. I'm guessing Caitlyn Jenner wasn't the only person in attendance, nor was she the only celebrity in attendance. Nevertheless, we find it necessary to follow her every move. Why? I think the bigger question is why does FB want us to believe that this is a news item? Is it cool to follow the transgendered now? Why can't she just live a normal life? Seems this is what she is after since transitioning from Bruce Jenner, Olympic Champ to Caitlyn Jenner, no job listed...to live a normal, girl next door kind of life. Let her be, for goodness sake.

Next, in keeping with a theme of sorts is the story, of Aly Raisman, who, apparently, is another Olympian and, I'm guessing, a woman. This one, however, has bared all (literally) for ESPN's Magazine body issue. Well, it IS the BODY issue. Truth in advertising, I guess. Besides, she's only about half a yard of material less clad than most images on Facebook anyway. I mean, seriously, did you see Caitlyn Jenner's magazine cover photo plastered all over FB?

Lest we forget the quizzes to help us discover which Superbowl performer we are (honest to goodness this is the last one I saw on my wall just a few minutes ago, told you I was an addict) ...or what our dream job should be...or our 50's name in an alternate universe if we live to be 100 would be. Which Disney Princess are you? I don't know, my bigger concern is which Disney Princess is Caitlynn Jenner. Seems to be far more pressing than my inner princess.

Then there's all the hot button issues that serve to divide us. Here's a partial list: Gay marriage (yay or nay, both sides are equally obnoxious); Pro life (or anti abortion if you are against abortion but wish to personally turn the switch for the electric chair); Police (nothing in particular and yet everything at once -- talk about damned if you do and damned if you don't); $15.00 minimum wage for fast food workers (and the argument that EMT's, soldiers in the US Army and firefighters will make less); drug testing for people on welfare (although the aforementioned seem to have pushed this one to the back burner); gun control (most statistics about other countries that have extreme gun control are misleading, those "facts" need to be researched better before sharing, just saying); vaccinations (I'm begging you PLEASE do some research and don't rely on the one and only source that tells you that the vaccines are the cause of all that is wrong with this world, look at the SCIENCE) and the removal of the Confederate flag (pssst...southerners, it's over and you didn't "win"). All of these issues really do nothing more than distract us from what is really going on. As we ramp up for a presidential election it is going to get just plain ugly out there, too! I hear Caitlyn Jenner is thinking of running, once she gets used to the heels.

I am going to close this meeting with a quick prayer...Mark Zuckerberg grant me the ability to accept all truths as posted on Facebook, courage to voice my opinion about EVERYTHING and the wisdom to update my status often.

Now I've got to run, Cailtyn Jenner is going to have a live question and answer period in a few minutes.




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